It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
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