Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
Randomize
