i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Randomize
