so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
Randomize
