Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
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