I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
Randomize
