ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
I woke up under a house in Key West
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