sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
Randomize
