you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize
