But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
You know, be my cock's hype man.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
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