omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
Randomize
