She's JV to your varsity
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
Randomize
