I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Randomize
