your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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