wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
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