That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
