OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize
