my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
