let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
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