Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Randomize
