So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Randomize
