It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
