Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
