What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
