i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
Randomize
