ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Randomize
