Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
I just got a text giving me an hour window for when my vibrator is gonna be delivered. If that's not awesome customer service, I don't know what is.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize
