This girl is more easily done than said...
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
Randomize
