saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
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