when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
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