we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
You are the jesus of drinking
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
