He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
Randomize