she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
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