Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future�
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
Randomize
