So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
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