I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
