No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
Randomize
