Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
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