I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Randomize
