yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Randomize
