You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
why is half of my head shaved?
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