i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
What drink are we having for lunch?
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
i need some magic done to my vagina
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
