So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
apparently the secret to your success is patron
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Randomize