how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
My balls are so social today.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
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