Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
Randomize
