I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Randomize
