Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
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