Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
