is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
Randomize
