That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
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